How Trauma Lives in Your Body (Not Just Your Mind)

Trauma reshapes your biology. When survival mode (fight/flight/freeze) gets locked “on,” even small stressors – a honking car on Mary Hill Bypass, a crowded grocery store at Port Coquitlam Centre – can trigger overwhelming reactions. You might experience:

Physical Signs:

• Chronic pain or tension (clenched jaw, stiff shoulders) with no medical cause.

• Hypervigilance – constantly scanning rooms for “danger,” leaving you exhausted.

• Shutdown or dissociation – feeling “zoned out” or disconnected during conflict.

Emotional Signs:

• Flashbacks or nightmares that make the past feel vivid and current.

• Guilt or shame that clings despite knowing the trauma wasn’t your fault.

• Feeling “broken” or “too damaged” to heal.

Behavioural Signs:

• Avoiding places, people, or activities that remind you of the trauma (like skipping walks around Hyde Creek Trail if that’s where it happened).

• Self-sabotage – pushing people away or numbing with substances to mute the pain.

• Overreacting to minor stressors (a partner being late feels life-threatening).

Why “Just Talk About It” Isn’t Enough

Trauma memories aren’t stored like regular ones. They get trapped in the brain’s amygdala (the “alarm center”) and body, bypassing rational thought. This is why:

• Talking about the event might retraumatize you, flooding your system.

• You can’t “logic” your way out of triggers – your body reacts faster than your mind.

• Coping strategies like avoidance or people-pleasing keep you stuck in survival mode.

EMDR and somatic therapy work differently. They help your nervous system complete the survival response frozen in time, so your body learns, “The threat is over. I’m safe now.”

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: What's the difference between trauma and PTSD?
A: Trauma is what happens to you , the difficult experience itself. PTSD is what can develop afterward when your brain and body have trouble processing what happened. Not everyone who experiences trauma develops PTSD, and that's completely normal. Your brain is trying to protect you, but sometimes it gets stuck in protection mode.

Q: Can you get PTSD from things that aren't "big" traumas?

A: Absolutely. PTSD can develop from what might seem like "smaller" events ,emotional abuse, bullying, medical procedures, car accidents, or even ongoing stress. Your brain doesn't judge whether something is "big enough" to be traumatic. If it felt overwhelming to you at the time, it was real trauma.

Q: Do I need to talk about what happened in detail during therapy?

A: No, you don't have to relive every detail. Good trauma therapy isn't about forcing you to tell your story over and over. We use approaches like EMDR and somatic therapy that help your nervous system heal without having to talk through everything. We go at your pace, and you're always in control.

Q: How long does trauma therapy take?

A: There's no set timeline because everyone heals differently. Some people notice changes in a few weeks, others take months or longer. It depends on things like how long ago the trauma happened, what support you have, and what other stresses are going on in your life. Healing isn't linear , you might feel better, then have a tough week, then feel better again.

Q: Will I ever feel "normal" again?

A: Yes, but "normal" might look different than before. Trauma changes you, and that's not necessarily bad. Many people find they become different versions of themselves, more compassionate, or more aware of what matters to them. Recovery doesn't mean forgetting what happened, it means the memories don't control your life anymore.

Q: What triggers should I expect during trauma therapy?

A: Triggers are different for everyone, but common ones include certain sounds, smells, places, times of year, or even feelings in your body. We'll work together to identify your triggers and create a plan for managing them. The goal isn't to avoid triggers forever, but to help your nervous system learn that you're safe now.

Q: Can trauma therapy help with relationship problems?

A: Definitely. Trauma often affects how we connect with others - maybe you have trouble trusting people, feel like you need to be perfect, or keep everyone at arm's length. These are normal ways your brain tries to protect you. Therapy helps you learn new ways to feel safe in relationships.

Q: What if I don't remember much about what happened?

A: That's completely normal. Sometimes our brains protect us by blocking out memories. You don't need to remember everything to heal. Your body holds the memories even when your mind doesn't, and trauma therapy can help your nervous system process what happened without forcing memories to come back.

Q: Is it normal to feel worse before I feel better?

A: Yes, this is really common. As your nervous system starts to heal, you might feel more emotional or notice symptoms you didn't see before. Think of it like cleaning out a wound, it might hurt more at first, but it's part of the healing process. We'll prepare you for this and give you tools to manage tough days.

Q: What should I expect in my first trauma therapy session?

A: Your first session is about getting to know each other and making sure you feel safe. We'll talk about what brought you in, what you hope to change, and what therapy might look like. You won't be expected to share traumatic details right away. It's all about building trust and creating a foundation for healing.

Q: How do I prepare for trauma therapy?

A: The most important thing is to be gentle with yourself. Trauma therapy can be emotionally demanding, so make sure you have support, whether that's friends, family, or other healthy coping strategies. It's also helpful to have a list of questions you want to ask and any concerns you have about starting therapy.

Q: How can I find a therapist who understands the trauma issues I face?

A: Look for therapists who work with trauma and understand the extra challenges you might face based on your background or experiences. It's helpful to find someone who gets how your family or culture might affect how you deal with difficult experiences. Therapists like Zahra Lakhdhir and Suki O'Huallachain create a safe space where you can work on healing without judgment.

Are You Ready to Move Past These Symptoms?

Healing from trauma is possible, and you don’t have to do it alone. At Serenity Counselling, we provide a safe, supportive space to process your experiences and reclaim your life.

Ready to take the first step?—Book a free consultation.

Somatic Therapy: Healing the Body’s Memory
Trauma lives in your posture, breath, and nervous system. Somatic therapy helps you:

• Track Sensations: Notice where fear, anger, or numbness show up physically (e.g., a racing heart, cold hands).

• Release Stuck Survival Energy: Shaking, crying, or breathing techniques discharge trapped fight/flight energy.

• Reclaim Safety: Use grounding tools (feeling your feet on the floor at Blakeburn Lagoons, orienting to the present) to calm your nervous system.

Together, EMDR and Somatic Work Help You:

• Reduce flashbacks, nightmares, and emotional overwhelm.

• Feel calm in your body during triggers (e.g., loud noises, conflict).

• Rebuild trust in yourself and others.

  Imagine…

  • Walking through your neighbourhood without scanning for threats.

  • Sleeping deeply, waking up rested instead of wired.

  • Setting boundaries with confidence, knowing your needs matter.

  • Feeling at home in your body – no more numbness, panic, or shame.

  Read More: How EMDR Therapy Can Help Heal Trauma