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Therapy Sessions in Port Coquitlam

Therapy for Relationships & Communication

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THERAPISTS SPECIALIZING IN THIS AREA:
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Shay

Carrie

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Zahra

Suki

Symptoms of Relationship Issues

Cognitive

Overthinking past relationships or doubting your self-worth.

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Emotional

Loneliness, resentment, or fear of rejection.

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Behavioural

Avoiding dating, struggling to trust others, or repeating unhealthy patterns.

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Physical

Headaches, digestive issues, and muscle tension.

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Are You In a Relationship but Still Feeling Completely Alone?

You're not sure when things shifted. Maybe it was gradual. The same argument cycling back every few months. The conversations that used to come easily now feeling like work. The distance between you and your partner that neither of you fully addresses because you don't know how to start.

Or maybe it's not a relationship you're in right now. Maybe it's the one that ended and you still can't figure out why, or why it still has this much hold on you. Maybe it's the pattern you keep noticing, different people, same story, and you're starting to wonder what that says about you.

Relationship struggles show up in a lot of different ways. The constant arguments about the same things that never actually get resolved. The feeling that your partner doesn't really see you, or that you've stopped trying to be seen. The anxiety that shows up in dating, the second guessing, the fear of being too much or not enough. The loneliness of being in a relationship and still feeling completely alone.

Most people wait a long time before getting support for this. Years sometimes. They tell themselves it will get better on its own, or that their problems aren't serious enough to warrant help, or that asking for it somehow means the relationship is over.

It doesn't. Getting support is what people do when they actually care about what they have, or about not carrying old patterns into what comes next.

Read More: How Shame Affects Relationships

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Why Relationship Patterns Are So Hard to Change on Your Own

The way we show up in relationships is deeply shaped by what we learned early on. How conflict was handled in your family. Whether your needs were met consistently. What love looked like, and what it cost. Most of that gets carried forward without us realizing it, running quietly in the background of every relationship we have.

That's why reading the right book or knowing logically what you should do differently doesn't always change anything. The patterns aren't just in your head. They're in your nervous system. In how you respond when you feel criticized or abandoned or unseen. In the automatic ways you protect yourself that made sense at some point but keep getting in the way now.

This isn't about blame, yours or anyone else's. It's about understanding what's actually driving the dynamic so you can start to change it.

Understanding Your Patterns Is Where Change Actually Starts

At Serenity Counselling, we work with people navigating all kinds of relationship struggles. Couples who love each other but can't seem to stop hurting each other. People processing a breakup that hit harder than they expected. Women who keep finding themselves in the same kinds of relationships and want to understand why. Anyone trying to figure out how to show up differently than they always have.

We don't take sides. We don't tell you what to do. We help you understand what's happening underneath the surface so you can make clearer, more grounded choices about what you actually want and how to get there.Read More: The Purposeful Path to Couples Therapy

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What to Expect in Relationship Therapy Sessions at Serenity Counselling

At Serenity Counselling in Port Coquitlam, your first session is a conversation. We want to understand what's been going on, what patterns you keep running into, and what you're hoping feels different. You can come on your own or with your partner.

From there, the work depends on what you're dealing with. For couples, sessions focus on understanding the cycle you're stuck in, not just the content of your arguments, but what's happening underneath them. What each person is actually needing. Where the disconnection started. How to communicate in a way that doesn't just escalate the same old fight.

For individuals, we work on understanding your attachment patterns and how they play out in your relationships. We look at what you learned about love and safety early on, and how that's showing up now. We build practical tools for setting boundaries, expressing needs, and breaking the cycle of repeating dynamics that aren't working for you.

For clients whose relationship struggles are connected to past trauma, betrayal, or painful experiences, our team is trained in EMDR and Brainspotting. These approaches can help your nervous system process what's been keeping you stuck in ways that talk therapy alone sometimes can't reach.

We offer in-person relationship counselling sessions in Port Coquitlam at Serenity Counselling, and virtual therapy across British Columbia.

Read More: Breaking Down Heartbreak: Coping After a Breakup

Are You Ready to Move Past These Symptoms?

Healthy relationships start with you. At Serenity Counselling, we help you heal from past hurts, build confidence, and create meaningful connections.

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LOOKING FOR MORE ANSWERS?

Frequently Asked Questions

  • You know if you need relationship counselling after a breakup when you're still feeling stuck weeks or months later. If you need relationship counselling, it's usually because you're constantly thinking about your ex, avoiding dating completely, or feeling like you'll never find love again. When a breakup is affecting your work, friendships, or how you see yourself, that's when relationship counselling can really help you heal and move forward.

  • The difference between normal breakup sadness and needing therapy is how long it lasts and how much it takes over your life. Normal breakup sadness comes in waves , some days are harder than others, but you can still function. But if you need therapy after a breakup, you might be stuck in bed for days, checking their social media obsessively, or feeling completely hopeless about love. When breakup sadness turns into avoiding all your friends or not being able to focus on anything else for months, that's when therapy can help.

  • Yes, relationship counselling will help you get over your ex, even though it probably feels impossible right now. When people ask "will relationship counselling help me get over my ex," I understand that doubt, heartbreak makes it hard to imagine feeling different. But relationship counselling doesn't just help you "get over" someone; it helps you understand why the breakup hit you so hard and teaches you tools to heal. Most people start feeling less consumed by thoughts of their ex within a few weeks of starting therapy.

  • Absolutely! Relationship counselling can definitely help you figure out why you keep dating the same type of person. When you keep dating the same type and it's not working out, there's usually a pattern happening that you can't see clearly on your own. In relationship counselling, we'll explore why you're drawn to certain people, maybe they remind you of family dynamics, or there's something familiar about the chaos. Once you understand why you keep dating the same type, you can start making different choices.

  • Yes, it's completely normal to feel scared about dating again after a bad relationship, that fear makes total sense. When you feel scared about dating again, your brain is trying to protect you from getting hurt like that again. It's actually smart that you're cautious. In relationship counselling, we'll work on understanding what specifically makes dating feel scary and help you figure out how to trust your gut about new people while still being open to good connections.

  • EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, and yes, EMDR can help with relationship trauma from things like betrayal, emotional abuse, or really painful breakups. When people ask "what is EMDR for relationship trauma," I explain it as a way to help your brain process those stuck, painful memories so they don't keep hurting you in new relationships. EMDR for relationship trauma helps you heal from what happened without having to talk about every detail over and over again. Many people find EMDR helps them trust again and feel less triggered by things that remind them of past hurt.

  • EMDR for relationship issues can bring up memories, but it's designed to make them feel less painful, not worse. When people worry "does EMDR bring up painful memories," I tell them that yes, we do work with difficult memories, but in a way that helps you process them safely. During EMDR for relationship issues, those painful memories start feeling more like something that happened to you rather than something that's still happening. You stay in control the whole time, and we can slow down or stop if anything feels too intense.

  • You'll know if you're ready to start dating again when you feel genuinely curious about getting to know someone new, not just trying to fill a void or prove you're "over" your ex. When people ask "how do I know if I'm ready to start dating again," I suggest looking at your motivations. Are you dating because you're excited about connecting with someone, or because you're lonely and hoping someone else will fix how you feel? In relationship counselling, we'll explore what "ready to start dating again" actually means for you personally.

  • Look for therapists who work with women and understand the extra pressure women feel in relationships. It's also helpful to find someone who gets your background and family culture around dating and relationships. Therapists like Zahra Lakhdhir and Suki O'Huallachain create a safe space where you can talk about your relationship struggles without feeling judged.